Are Boundaries Biblical??

 

Are  Boundaries Biblical?? YES!!

As Christians we need boundaries in order to have healthy
relationships. It is easy to overlook this important step. Boundaries
are an important part of our lives and others. It is important for our
spiritual, physical, mental and emotional health.

Think of boundaries as your personal fence, that protects your
personal space. You are at a healthy distance, but it keeps out anyone
or anything that can cause harm, physically, mentally or emotionally. It
is a line where you end and they begin. It defines who you are, a
sense of ownership.

It allows you to be in control of your time, energy, resources and money,
when to say yes and when to say no. You decide what you will and will
not tolerate. 
 
Sometimes people are difficult, hurtful, and hard to be around. They
suck the life right out of you, zap your energy, get you off track,
discourage you, and damage you emotionally, and leave you feeling
awful. If you feel like this, it is time to set boundaries.

Boundaries are for us personally(this is my jurisdiction and you don't
have the right to cross it), this helps protect us from people who have
no self control.

We should pray and forgive, and hand it over to God!
Forgiveness doesn't mean we have to let them back in.
Forgiveness is given and trust is earned! 

Even Jesus set boundaries!

Matthew 14:22-23(Immediately Jesus made the disciples get into the
boat and go on ahead of him to the other side, while he dismissed the
crowd. After he had dismissed them, he went up on a mountainside by
himself to pray. 

Mark 1:35(Very early in the morning, while it was still
dark, Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where
he prayed)

**Jesus took care of his needs, and he prioritized his time, so should we!

 

God Bless and For daily motivation go and follow my  Facebook Page

What does the Bible say about Codependency!

 

Codependency is a choice mentally in which people use each
other to get their emotional needs met in a selfish way.

Where did codependency come from: It comes from pain we
suffered as a child, and becomes expressed in adulthood. It is
self-loathing and self-sacrificial behaviors, which brings misery
instead of joy.

Instead of unconditional love an acceptance, they use each other, 
to get something for themselves.

They rely on each other for their emotional and physical needs,
instead of taking care of themselves. Plus they lack confidence in
God to care for their needs, and manipulate others to get what they
want.

This way they both feel OK, even though, it's unhealthy.

They avoid the truth in love and have trouble recognizing their own
sinful habits, and need for repentance.

Pride, fear and boundaries are related to codependency.
(Proverbs 29:25) The fear of man lays a snare, but whoever
trusts in the Lord is safe. Pride keeps us from seeing our self,
the way God sees us. God loves us regardless, but he also says
we are wicked and need a Savior. (Mark 10:18) And Jesus said to
him, 'Why do you call me good? No one is good except God alone. 
This can offend people's pride!

Codependent people are loyal, but in a toxic way, because they
support sinful and even illegal behavior. They even deny they have a
problem.

It's fear driven, because they want people to like them, this results in
people pleasing behaviors, it's about their own selfish desires.

Codependents don't feel whole, and copy others to gain a sense of
identity. This keeps them from making their own choices. It is about
control, they try to manipulate and control others, rather than focus
on themselves, an overstep peoples boundaries. We need healthy
boundaries to maintain a healthy relationship.

The Bible gives us instructions by telling us how we ought to relate to
one another. Instead of codependent it is interdependency(mutually
responsible to others while sharing responsibilities.) 

Solutions:

Jesus said we are to love one another equal to ourselves, not more
than ourselves. Codependents consider themselves of no value, and
people please, They act out of guilt and fear, and need to be needed(so
they use the other person to meet their own needs. They need each
other to be OK, so they will be OK!

Solution 1: they need to gain their self-worth through Jesus Christ, it's
not based on work, or the service you perform. Service is a choice.
Solution 2: they need to have balanced living and take care of them-
selves.

Solution 3: they need to live balanced lives, take responsibility for their
own health and well-being.

Solution 4: they need to have healthy boundaries and set limits, and
not allow others to compromise those boundaries.

Solution 5: they need to help in appropriate ways, by letting others act
independently, rather than making others dependent on them.

Solution 6: they need to learn to be God directed, knowing that God
brings the ultimate results.

Christian Counselors can help with Codependency-by encouraging
and being honest and can model healthy living. Codependency is
not biblical. The scriptures are not characterized by manipulation,
dependency, or control others, or striving for approval. Christians find
their identity in Christ, by being loved, accepted, forgiven and redeemed
by Jesus Christ.

God Bless and for daily motivation go and follow my Facebook Page

It's that time of year, get in shape quickly!

First of all you need self discipline, realistic goals and a plan!

Don't compare yourself to others, this is about you, and your
health.

Set a schedule for yourself:

Monday-20 minutes of upper body strength
Tuesday-20 minutes of walking, jogging, or running
Wednesday-20 minutes of lower body strength
Thursday-20 minutes of walking, jogging, or running
Friday-20 minutes of all over body strength
Saturday-20 minutes of walking, jogging, or running
Sunday-Time for a Break! Shew(LOL)

Diet Changes:

Reduce foods with salt, sugar and trans fat
Eat lean proteins(fish, ground turkey, beans, greek yogurt, and eggs)
Eat lots of veggies and fruits, whole grains, and low fat
Avoid cholesterol and saturated fats

Consider meal planning and prepping
Consider how many calories 
Use smaller plates
Eat portion sizes(measure)

No fast-food and no sugary drinks

Here are some steps to consider:

Talk to your doctor, make sure you have no health conditions
Drink plenty of water(before and after meals)
Set realistic goals(take pics along the way)
Don't get discouraged it takes time
Don't give up
Don't focus on number
Focus on how you feel, how your clothes fit, and health improvement
Be consistent

Clean out those cabinets(toss)(sugar, junkfood, soda, juices, coffee
creamer, processed foods, high salt content, prepackaged snacks)
Instead get healthy snacks(nuts, whole fruits, chopped veggies,
hummus, low salt whole grain crackers, yogurt and seeds)

Slow down while eating(it takes your brain 20 minutes to realize 
it's full)

Get a good nights sleep(turn off phone and tv a hour before going 
to bed, turn down lights)

Let's do this!

God Bless and for daily motivation go and follow My Facebook Page

Can you commit to the Entertainment Challenge?

 

The Entertainment Challenge!

The importance of who we hang around, what we listen to and
what we watch can make a huge impact on our daily lives.

Pay attention to the word Entertainment, it has the word Enter
in it.

For 30 days:

Listen only to Christian Music
Only Hang around Christian Family and Friends
Watch only Christian movies, or shows

And see the impact this has on your life!

Are you up for the challenge?

God Bless and For daily motivation go and follow My Facebook Page

Are you Helping or Enabling??

Helping VS Enabling

Helping- is to give or provide for someone who can't help themselves.

Helping can be considered an act of kindness, but overdoing it can backfire.

Enabling- is to continue to help someone who should be doing it for
themselves. The person is receiving help instead of facing the
consequences and being held accountable, so they continue with this
behavior.

This is actually harmful not helpful- people tend to do this out of guilt,
pity, or shame. When they should be helping them find a solution. It can
actually, make the situation worse. Are you helping them make positive
changes, or making it worse, by keeping them stuck and then they
continue. You are actually keeping an unhealthy connection between you
both, called codependency. You are not a helper, you are an enabler. 

True help comes from inspiring them to be the best they can be!

Setting Healthy Boundaries lets people know what you will and will not
tolerate.

If you continue to keep rescuing them they grow weaker and become
dependent on you to bail them out. Instead teach them on how to handle
the situation. You can create a stronger impact on their life by teaching 
them on how to help themselves.

Sometimes we make excuses for them, but that only gives room for more
toxic behavior. They have to face the consequences or they will never learn.

Encourage them by helping them find the right resources, so they can
learn to help themselves. 

Jesus was not an enabler, he let people have free will, he never imposed,
even if they went away empty handed.

Sometimes God is working something out in their life, if we enable we
are interfering with God's plan.

Yes we should help others, but it shouldn't be a continuous thing.
Help once and teach them how.

Learn to help but not enable!

We are to help those who can't help themselves, but if they are able, 
we should encourage them to do so!

Romans 14:12 
So then each one of us will give an account of himself to God

Galatians 6:5 
For each one will bear his own load.

God Bless and for daily motivation go and follow My Facebook Page